Back at it...

So I may have ruined whatever it is I have/had with C.  Not that I did anything all that bad, I don't think, but I still may have.

So last night she came to Boston with her friend.  Ok.  Not what I expected to happen, but I can hang.  No biggie.  Then they decided that we were going out downtown.  Now, I don't mind going downtown and going out, but it's really not my scene.  So I went and we met up with another of her friends.  Ended up at a bar/night club where the girls wanted to dance.  Ok.  Fine.  However, I then somehow get stuck on bag guarding duty for her friend's bag.  Not her bag, her friend's bag.  Now, I'm not much of a dancer but I have been known to get on the floor, but since I was on bag duty I had no choice...and looked like one of those dudes who can't have fun and just hangs out at the bar.

So at last call we were waiting around for her friend to get/give her phone number to whatever dudes she happened to be hitting on/being hit on by.  (Side note:  Her friends are a bit slutty.  I don't see girls at bars throwing themselves at guys like these two were very often.  Not that it should matter to me.)  In the meantime the conversation between me and C somehow came to what she liked about me.  "I really love that you're so chill and that you're cool with all of this."  This kind of put the thought in my head "Cool with all of what?  I literally have NO idea what this is."  On the way home she was texting someone.  A friend she assured me.  I looked her in the eye and said "I know you don't owe me anything and I really don't expect a lot, but please just don't play me."  She seemed a tiny bit offended that I would even say that, so I said "Not that I think you are, but you can just never tell.  I'm just asking you to be honest with me.  Thats all."  Her friend and her drove themselves home at about 3.  I sent a text that said "Good night beautiful.  Drive safely and I can't wait to see you again."  No response.  The girl has been texting like a maniac all night long with whoever, but she can't return 1 to me?  That's weird right?

So this morning I sent her a text to call me.  She called at about 930 (yeah, I was up before 930 because I was fucking thinking about this B.S.)  She sounded like she just woke up.  I said "Listen, I don't want to get all heavy and have a deep conversation here but I really need to know what this is.  I'm not asking you for commitment, I'm not asking for anything to change, I just need to know what this is so I know I'm not wasting my time."  I think this caught her off guard, but her response was "I figured we'd have to talk about this sooner or later.  I really don't know.  I was in a relationship for a long time and I'm really trying to find out who I am.  So I really don't know."

She said she needed to think and that she'd call me later today...we'll see.  She is either really flakey or just avoiding me because its anyone's guess whether she will call me when she says she will or not.  

On another note, I felt like her and her friends were really young and immature.  I mean, I'm not the most mature guy, but these girls are like I was when I was a freshman in college which was years ago.  I'm king of over going out and getting shit faced and wild.  They're not.  So I guess that's something I need to take into account in all of this.  I don't know what to think, say, do...I'm lost.  Yet again.